"Juno"-Hip Chick Flick or Anti-Abortion Propaganda?

Sure I'd heard all the rave reviews and acclaim for the movie Juno, but there was still something that really disturbed me about seeing a hip, pregnant teenager on the movie poster. I figured I'd have to check it out for myself and form my own opinion about a film that I thought was sending a dangerous message.

It seems teen pregnancy is all the rage these days. What with sixteen year old Jamie-Lynn Spears' announcement that she's expecting and Juno's release coinciding at nearly the same moment, most teenage girls would be led to believe that getting pregnant is a cool thing to do. Your family will support you, you'll have all the money you need, and despite the minor embarrassment of being pregnant while most of your friends are going out and partying, everything will turn out just fine. NOT!

In the film, Juno (Ellen Page), a hip, witty, and intelligent teen finds herself knocked-up after losing her virginity to her best male friend (Michael Cera). Sure, she's a little upset, but handles the situation fairly nonchalantly, announcing to the father that she's pregnant, but she'll have it “taken care of” without asking him for money or even worrying about how she's going to pay for the abortion. Usually, this is the number one worry after teens get pregnant, but although Juno doesn't have a job or wealthy parents, it seems to be no issue.

Sure enough, Juno comes across an anti-abortion protester at the abortion clinic , in the form of a female classmate of Juno's who notifies her that her “all babies want to get born” and “baby has fingernails.” Incredulous, Juno responds “fingernails, huh?” leading us to believe that Juno is just being facetious.

Apparently, she wasn't. All it takes is a rude receptionist and a few nervous patients in the waiting room clicking their shoes and twiddling their thumbs and Juno bolts out of there, leading the anti-abortion protester with a sense of satisfaction, as well as all the anti-abortion weasels who end up seeing this movie. Congratulations, you won. Juno's going to have her baby and give it up for adoption.

So Juno and her best friend start looking around for a happy ending to all this and find it in the local “Penny Saver” with a perfect-looking yuppie couple (Jason Bateman and Jennifer Garner) looking to adopt their first baby. Juno then announces to her father and stepmother her pregnancy and...wouldn't ya know it? They aren't that upset. They vow to support her and Dad promises to accompany Juno to meet the couple she's going to give her baby to. Still, he Dad can't help but be disappointed and tells Juno, “I didn't think you were that kind of girl.”

Noooooo! All the build-up until this point has shown us that Juno knows exactly what kind of girl she is-smart, funny, willing to make decisions for herself, independent. She's the girl we all wanted to be in high school. Now, everything is knocked down and Juno admits she's just as confused as all the girls and really has no grasp on her identity. Well so much for that.

So Juno and her Dad meet with the adoptive couple, Mark and Vanessa, who live in a McMansion out in some comfortable suburb. They're yuppies to a T and Vanessa is the kind of woman who declares, "I was born to be a mother." Gag. Mark, on the other hand, isn't so sure about the whole fatherhood thing. He's an ex grunge musician who sold out to write commercial jingles and has one room in the whole house to re-live his youth. It's decorated with rock posters and crammed with CD's, guitars, and recording equipment. Immediately, he and Juno hit it off and start playing music together. Juno seems to like Mark much better than Vanessa, and really, who wouldn't? Vanessa is one of those uptight yuppie women who wants everything to be perfect in her life and just needs a child to spoil to complete that perfection.

Juno frequents the house on several occasions unexpectedly and begins to realize that Mark and Vanessa's marriage isn't all it's cracked up to be. It was Mark who placed the Penny Saver ad, not Vanessa, who would never do something so tacky. Juno gets admonished by her stepmother for stopping by the house while Mark is home alone, explaining to Juno that "Mark is a married man" and that the dynamics of marriage are very complicated. Oh please! Do people really still think like that? Here Juno is about to give these people the greatest gift in the world and she can't even stop by to visit with them whenever she wants because she's female and you shouldn't tempt men like that. Is this really the message that's being sent here? I'm not going to give away the rest of the plot here...but apparently so.

Also included is the obligatory ultrasound scene where the women coo over images of Juno's fetus as if a litter of puppies was just placed in front of them. When the ultrasound technician makes a condescending comment about Juno's capabilities as a teenage mother, Juno's stepmother rallies to her stepdaughter's defense, indicating that she could be just as good a mother as an older couple would be. Sorry, but I'd have to side with the ultrasound technician here. No, teenagers aren't equipped to be good parents. As far as I'm concerned, neither is anyone under the age of 25. They're not mature and usually not financially able to care for children, not to mention the fact that teen mothers usually put off college and higher education because raising a child requires so much time and energy.

Juno is also portrayed as the sexual aggressor in the relationship that caused the pregnancy. Normally, I would commend this, but once again, we have the sexually aggressive female being "punished" for her actions. It's almost non-existent to see films nowadays where the female is sexually aggressive and aware and NOT have her reap some sort of punishment for her actions, whether it be pregnancy, rape, or getting an STD. Rarely do we see this with male protagonists. So Juno is subjected to be stared at in the hallways at school, ridiculed, and forced to go through the painful process of childbirth all because she had sex. Once.

Does it sound like I hated this movie? I didn't. Actually Juno is well-written, superbly acted (especially Ellen Page), and actually pretty funny and entertaining. I would actually recommend that people go see it. What I hated about it was the message it sent, particularly to teenagers, that it's ok to be pregnant and have your baby just so you can give it up to some couple to adopt. That all it takes to stop someone from having an abortion is telling them that "their baby has fingernails." That if you are a sexually aggressive female, you will somehow be punished. That if you decide to have your baby, your family will support you and you will all live happily ever after, playing guitar on the sidewalk with your true love like nothing ever happened.

Let's face it, teenagers should be encouraged to have abortions. That is the right thing to do. Abortions are fairly painless and inexpensive compared to childbirth and nobody needs to know you ever even had one. Giving birth to a baby is a long process that is fairly difficult to hide. If Jamie-Lynn Spears had had an abortion, surely it would not be the tabloid news that it is now, and surely she would not be the "pro-life" poster child she is now. When can we see the movie where a woman has an abortion and screams "hallelujah, my problem is gone!" afterwards like I did after I had mine?

As much as I thought Juno was an entertaining film, I walked away from it with an uneasy feeling that it was essentially a "pro-lifer's" dream movie. I expected a bit more from writer Diablo Cody, an ex-sex worker, but what I got was the cool chick making the Republican choice. And that makes me want to barf blue slushee in someone's vase.